Eating Disorders: Not Just a Side Effect of Trauma (A Helpful Reframe to Increase Compassion During Your Recovery Journey)
I went into treatment on a mission to determine “which traumatic event” most contributed to the formation and perpetuation of my eating disorder. While I recognize that this is a rather narrow frame (among a few other problems with this line of thinking), it was ironically informed by my attempt to be “open-minded” about my need for healing. I thought that if I could just pinpoint the right traumatic event, I’d understand why this disorder had taken root, and I could begin healing. I went in expecting to learn about how my eating disorder was a coping mechanism for certain life experiences peppered throughout my childhood and adult life.
And a quick “eating disorders and trauma” Google search can validate this frame of thinking. Resources from eating disorder treatment centers, Project HEAL, Psychology Today, and the National Institutes of Health provide information like:
“Studies have shown that individuals who have experienced trauma are more likely to engage in eating disorders such as bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, and anorexia nervosa.”
“Eating disorders and trauma are closely related—eating disorders rarely take root in a vacuum. They often emerge as a response to something else, frequently a previous trauma.”
“Unresolved traumas and eating disorders often coexist.”
This is valuable information, a way of framing eating disorders that allows many of us who have been impacted to unpack the layers of experiences that might need healing. But it often left me feeling so much pressure to dig deeply into my past to “find the thing” that caused this.
Recognizing the Eating Disorder as an Active Trauma
Early in my treatment, I explained to my therapist that I knew my eating disorder was “probably a trauma response” and a coping mechanism for various things. This is consistent with much of what I had read, heard, and understood about eating disorders over the years. As I was trying to consider potential sources for the development of my eating disorder, my therapist said: “While your eating disorder may be, in part, a response to past trauma and some uncomfortable emotions, your eating disorder itself is an active trauma, too.”
In that moment, I realized I had spent a lot of time viewing my eating disorder as just a byproduct of other issues. I had assumed that if I could identify and “deal with” those underlying issues, the eating disorder would resolve as a result. What I hadn’t acknowledged was that the hours, days, and years I’d spent restricting, compulsively exercising, and obsessing over food and my body had quite possibly (and probably) been physically, neurologically, socially, emotionally traumatizing (Association for Size Diversity and Health). Seeing my eating disorder for what it truly was—as its own form of trauma—gave me clarity and compassion for my healing that I hadn’t felt before.
Understanding What It Means to Call an Eating Disorder “Trauma”
In my own experience, my eating disorder felt paradoxically protective. It was like a “security blanket” that offered the illusion of control or safety (And this is, of course, not everyone’s experience). But as with any illusion, it came at a cost: the toll it took on my body, mind, and relationships. My eating disorder severed me from my intuition, disrupted my sense of worth, and stripped away time, energy, and stole moments of potential connection with others.
When we think of eating disorders as merely “maladaptive coping mechanisms” or responses to traumatic events, I now see that we risk missing the big picture. Even the most compassionate view of these behaviors as coping mechanisms can sometimes come with an implicit message that your eating disorder is rooted in other issues and that those are the “real” issues that need addressing. I broadened my understanding of the impact of eating disorders, in general: One that recognized the eating disorder itself is a form of trauma, one that needs to be healed directly – and not just in the form of weight restoration – rather than as a side effect of working through other issues. This reframing could have the potential to radically shift our mindset going into recovery.
I do think it’s important to note that framing an eating disorder as a trauma isn’t an attempt to pathologize or catastrophize. Instead, it can allow us to see the whole picture of someone’s or our own experience with an eating disorder. Understanding the potential implications of an eating disorder on our minds, bodies, and relationships invites us to recognize the importance and depth of our recovery journey. We don’t have to “fix” ourselves in order to “get rid of” the eating disorder; rather, we need to honor the full weight of what we’re healing from.
Honoring the Full Scope of Your Recovery
For many of us, recovery isn’t just about “resolving old issues” or diving into your “childhood trauma”; it’s about acknowledging that the disorder itself is a source of harm and trauma. When we reframe our thoughts about our eating disorder to embrace this reality, we give ourselves permission to heal in ways that honor every part of our experience. You deserve a recovery that holds space for all of it— past trauma, the eating disorder as trauma, and the hope for a life beyond it.
By: Erika Muller, Assistant for Wildflower Therapy LLC
All images via Unsplash
How Can Wildflower Therapy in Philadelphia, PA Help You?
If you’re looking for someone to come alongside you to help you unpack and approach the the complex set of experiences and emotions that come with having and healing from an eating disorder , our therapists in Pennsylvania are honored to help! In fact, you can get to know a little bit more about them here and book a free consultation here.
Other Mental Health Services Provided by Wildflower Therapy, Philadelphia, PA
Life is a unique and sometimes messy journey for each of us; we all have our own individual battles to fight. Our therapists know there is no one-size-fits-all approach to any of life’s challenges and because of that, we offer many unique perspectives and approaches to help meet you where you are with our Philadelphia, PA Therapy services.
With this in mind, we offer services for eating disorder therapy, services for anxiety, and depression, and have practitioners who specialize in perinatal mental health , maternal mental health, therapy for college students and athletes. As well as LGBTQIA+ Affirming Therapy. Accordingly, we have something to offer just about anyone in our Philadelphia, PA office. Reaching out is often the most difficult step you can take to improve your mental health. We look forward to partnering with you on this journey!
